Angie 00:00 Hello everybody, and good Monday morning. I am Angie Callen, the host of No More Mondays — the podcast where we believe you can have an amazing career or business and a thriving life on your terms. Every week I get to talk to people who walk that walk and come with resources to help you live and work authentically. I am especially excited for today’s conversation because I had the pleasure of meeting Andre Young in person earlier this year at the Growth Now Summit, where you’ve probably heard a few other guests come from. We sat next to each other at lunch and ended up getting into all kinds of good stuff — common interests around football, leadership, and most importantly, how life and work are not separate. They should be harmonious. Andre is the founder of You Evolving Now, where he’s on a mission to help leaders, teams, and individuals create healthier, more connected, and more harmonious workplaces. Wouldn’t we all love to be in one of those? Mental health therapist turned entrepreneur, speaker, and author — Andre brings a unique perspective on what it really takes to evolve as a leader and as a human being. Andre Young, welcome to No More Mondays.

Andre 01:05 Wow, Angie, thank you so much for having me. I think that was the best introduction I’ve ever gotten. I would love to bring you on the road to introduce me everywhere. And everybody listening — thank you for being here.

Angie 01:15 I’ve been excited about this since we first started chatting, because you just have something about you. You’re easy to talk to, you know what you’re talking about, and I love a person with an opinion they like to give directly but lovingly. I want to start by understanding a little more about your You Evolving Now story. What inspired you to get into this work and build the platform you’ve developed?

Andre 01:35 People think it’s because of my 19 years of background in mental health and being a leader and therapist in that space. It had nothing to do with that — nothing. I burnt out of mental health in year 15, even though I worked there for 19. It was really a divorce. I went through a divorce almost 20 years ago, and going through it — I will say that was the hardest time for me, emotionally, financially, physically. I remember driving in my car and something came on the radio about natural disasters — hurricanes and tornadoes — and I was like: wow, because that’s exactly what it feels like. And I’ll admit here in front of you and everybody — I was not the world’s best husband at that time. But I also wasn’t a monster. So I knew there were other good people, other good men out there who were failing in relationships not because they were bad people, but because they had nowhere good to go and nobody good to do it with. So I created a men’s organization. It started with people in my living room, then it kept growing, and then there were strangers in my house — which was weird. So we moved to cafes, then we got a conference, then a women’s division because women wanted it, then we were on college campuses. I fell out of love not with helping people, but with trying to get average individuals to spend their time and money on something good for themselves. When I pivoted and really rebuilt the business, I asked: where are people? People are at work, at school, and on their phones. I said — that’s where the business has to be. At the time, I didn’t know companies would want leadership content. They said: this is a great idea, but how does this help us? Because it was very personal growth and relationship-based. I said: oh, you want leadership — but I don’t talk about leadership. And then, I went home, looked at everything I had created, and realized — I was already talking about it. I was just coming at it from a different angle. All I did was add the word leadership to it, and boom. That’s how I got into it. I didn’t want to write books. I didn’t want to be on stages. I just wanted to be one of the guys in the room getting better. That’s it.

Angie 03:20 Well — the way you were meant to get better turned out to be writing books and being on stages. Sometimes you just can’t look the gift horse in the mouth. And I’m guessing your lived experiences, those 19 years in mental health, and the four years of working through burnout inform the way you approach this life and leadership work. Why do you think that mix is so effective and powerful?

Andre 03:42 Because I’ve been on both sides of a lot of things. I joke from the stage — at one point in my life I was the world’s best employee, says me. I was bad, then I was good. Then at another point I was the worst — not because I was bad at my job, but because of the things I was saying, what I was doing, how I disconnected. So I learned from being really good and from being really bad. And I truly believe that everyone in the world has a book and a story in them. You know what you’ve been through, what you’ve overcome. But very few of us say: this is what the issue is, this is what I want to help with, this is how I overcame it — and then actually write it down, formalize it, and teach it. That’s what I did. I’ve been on both sides of a lot of things — really good and really bad — and extracted the lessons into bite-sized bullet points of how to do it better.

Angie 04:25 I want to recognize something a lot of people don’t do, and that goes back to this idea that everybody has a book in them. Most people don’t know how to tell their story, don’t respect the fact that they have a story, let alone think it’s going to impact somebody. And you were willing to be vulnerable, put it out there — and look at the ripple effect you’ve been able to create.

Andre 04:45 Thank you. I love being able to learn from everyone. People say: do you have a mentor? I say the world is my mentor. I can sit down and have a 10-minute conversation with a homeless person — and I have — and gotten real nuggets from them, and them from me, hopefully. Everybody is a walking mentor of what to do or what not to do.

Angie 05:02 When you tune into that fact, you have the opportunity to actually learn from anyone. I grew up in a “everyone is equal, we all just have different circumstances” kind of home. So I treat everyone the same. When you have that lens, you’re willing to sit down with someone who’s worse off, not worse than you, and actually learn from them. Or you’re willing to say: here’s my story — here’s where I failed, and that doesn’t make me a failure, and here’s what I learned, and what you can learn from it. That really creates empathy. We need a lot more of that in this world.

Andre 05:30 And just because somebody has less than you doesn’t mean they’re less happy than you. There are gifts to be learned wherever you are. That person may be way more content in their life than you are in yours — and you’ve got the car, the house, the marriage. When I was doing therapy I worked in psych wards, in schools, in private offices, in homes. The home part always got me. I could pull up to what looked almost like a mansion — great on the outside — you walk in and it’s not what you think. The kids aren’t acting how you think, the parents aren’t acting how you think. Then on the same day I’d go to a client’s house that lives in the projects, and that family was the happiest I’d ever seen. Dinner at the dinner table, they made me eat. I had a great time going there.

Angie 06:15 Judgment is a very slippery slope — be careful how you pass it, everyone. So I think this is a good point to talk about how all of this — regardless of our lived experiences, our choices, the vulnerability we put out there — comes together into work-life harmony. I like to call it work-life integration. How does it all influence what we do at work in a more harmonious, orchestrated way versus the hard separation that so many people try to create?

Andre 06:45 Great question. I always ask — if you’ve heard of work-life balance, you know…

Angie 06:50 …that it’s a lie. That it does not exist.

Andre 06:53 It’s a lie. And even if you could get everything perfectly balanced, that makes me anxious just thinking about — how long will it stay that way? It takes so much effort. There are times you’re going to work more. Times you’re going to relax more. There might be health issues. I have four kids — I have no balance in that. What work-life harmony or integration allows, instead of this perfect balance we think we have to maintain, is the ability to exude great personal leadership. Personal leadership is attractive. How you choose to show up to your life, your work, and your relationships in a way that makes people’s eyebrow raise and say: I want to be that. They don’t know exactly what it is about you, but you just kind of got it together. The language you use, how you compliment other people, the way you walk into a room, how you email — it all comes from work-life harmony. What I mean by that is creating what I call a leader’s marriage. Marry what you want to do and give to what the person receiving your effort needs most from you right now. I know what my wife needs most from me right now. I might not even like it, but I know. I know what each of my kids wants. I know what my dad wants. I also know what I want and need — my hobbies, my personal time. I put all of those things intentionally into a calendar with alerts, so you have to actively ignore greatness rather than miss it by default. When this happens — this is what it does indirectly. Over time, that type of personal leadership and work-life harmony makes you a beacon. A magnet. You’re going to attract the right people who are curious and ready, and repel the right people who are not. You don’t have to be for everybody. Not everybody is going to like your evolution, and that’s okay. You don’t have to look down on them. You just keep being consistent. The real job is — when the not-ready get ready, they know where to come. And you’ll be even better when they get there.

Angie 08:30 Everything you’re talking about drills down to those two simple letters — the IT factor. You can establish an ecosystem where the IT factor is acknowledged and seen by other people. I love this idea of bringing together our three most significant life buckets — work, relationships, and our human self — and figuring out how the leadership marriage makes it all work. Work and life harmony comes when you’re exuding personal leadership that’s attractive, and when you treat your leadership and your work as a marriage. And when all of this comes together — guess what? No more Mondays. But the big thing is: people do not think about their career as a relationship. Sometimes it’s even more complex than the ones we have at home — because that’s you and one other person.

Andre 09:10 You spend more time with the people at work than almost anything else.

Angie 09:14 And there are ten of them, or more, at different levels — your relationship with the work itself, with the people, with the company, with your managers, with your peers, with the people reporting to you. Super complex. But when you exude that personal leadership, it becomes easier — less energy.

Andre 09:30 You know what it allows? I’m big on the three C’s. It enhances your communication, your connection, and the culture of your team — which drives results. Because results matter. We can’t pretend they don’t. What I tell leaders is: it is your job to sell your position. When you go into work, you need people to want to be you, to want your position, so you can get your next promotion and go on vacation without worrying about everything falling apart. That can’t happen if you walk in stressed out, gossiping, complaining, on your seventeenth marriage and third heart attack. Who the hell wants to be you?

Angie 10:00 And tight-fisted, micromanaging everything below you — exhausting.

Andre 10:05 This actually happened — they said: we want to get you promoted. And I thought: if the job makes you look like that, no thank you. If the job is okay with you coming in looking like that daily, no thank you. Their personal leadership was off. Not that they were a bad person — I just didn’t like what they were exuding. You can’t sell me on that position.

Angie 10:22 No thank you. This brings up something I read in your work — a lot of people get promoted because they do one thing well or because they have the knowledge base, not because they actually know how to lead. What do we need to know to avoid that trap and do leadership better?

Andre 10:40 Well, that’s two parts — the people doing the promoting and the people accepting the promotion. Let’s start with accepting. The first time I was ever offered a promotion, I took it for all the wrong reasons. It was the next logical step. I’d just gotten my master’s degree — I didn’t go to school for all of that to stay in the same place. It was more money and a cool title. I remember getting my leather briefcase — you couldn’t tell me nothing. I was feeling myself.

Angie 11:00 I finally get to wear the suit!

Andre 11:02 I was feeling myself. And not one point did I ever think about what it meant to actually lead people. It was about the position and the title. Not that I was anti-leading a team — I just had no course on that in college. Nobody ever talked to me about it. And in the interview, nobody even asked.

Angie 11:18 And most companies, unfortunately, don’t bring Andre in to coach people up on those skills. They let them flounder in the middle.

Andre 11:25 So you were the best machinist — we want you to lead a team of machinists. Just because they’re great at the job doesn’t mean they’re good with people. So you just lost your best machinist and got your worst leader, and now everybody under them is miserable. If I’m going to accept a position, one of the things I’d want to think about is: what vision do you have for your team now? What conversations do you need to have, acknowledging that you’re now leading your old peers? I talk about having the awkward conversation — setting expectations, sharing a blueprint. How do you want people to come to you with problems? What’s the method you prefer, the first sentence you want to hear, the information you need? Help me help you. I want to help you — come to me like this. And then: how do you want me to come to you when I have a question or a concern? Let me know your blueprint, here’s mine. Now for the person doing the promoting — the first thing to ask yourself is: why am I offering this to this person? Just because they’re good at their job doesn’t mean they want the position, feel comfortable in it, know how to lead, or even like people. I’ve heard “I don’t like people” — and that’s fine! But probably shouldn’t be leading a team.

Angie 12:30 You’re talking to a former engineer, and this is exactly why I stand on this soapbox. I was managed by engineers who don’t like people, sitting in this technical environment looking at people who are great at AutoCAD drawings and can’t have a conversation, thinking: why the hell did you make them a manager? Preaching to the choir — and I’m sure someone out there listening is going: oh, I’m one of those.

Andre 12:50 So why do you want to promote this person? And do they have the capabilities for both the administrative tasks and the people skills? If they do — great. If they don’t — what are you willing to provide? Training? Shadowing? Expectations beyond just checking the box and getting the job done? How will you evaluate them beyond an annual review where you rip them apart for not doing what you knew they couldn’t do when you hired them a year ago? There’s a lot that goes into both accepting and offering a promotion.

Angie 13:18 Years ago — I think my first year in business — I wrote an article riffing on this exact topic. About all the different ways you can grow in your career other than climbing the ladder, making more money, and getting a higher title. The problem is we on the professional side don’t always know what we want, sometimes don’t think there are any other options than the traditional corporate ladder, and on the promotion side, companies don’t offer alternative pathways. That article is still the number one lead generator to my website, because this topic hits. And I hope that one of the things you get to do when you go into organizations is help companies either upskill their people or give them alternative tracks to grow through subject matter expertise or technical specialization. There are multiple ways to incentivize and grow people.

Andre 14:05 Absolutely. I talk about five types of employees, and one of them is what I call the steady stream. Not every employee is going to be inspired and motivated and want to move up. You couldn’t afford that anyway — there’s not enough money or promotions.

Angie 14:18 You’d have a whole bunch of Angies and Andres sitting around a table yelling at each other.

Andre 14:22 You could not do that. Way too one-sided. So the steady stream is the person who’s fine right where they are — but they want to be good or great where they are. How do you help them with that? It may not always be money or promotion. It may be information, knowledge, training, certificates, or mentoring someone else. I was doing some work at a big company, and there was a woman there who was quadrupling everyone else’s metrics. Exceptional. Then one day she started to fall off — not badly, just doing what everyone else did. But she had set a precedent for herself. I met with her and found out she was going to quit and wanted to move out west. So I went to the VP and said: this person is thinking about leaving, and she wants to go out west. They said: oh, we have a facility out there. She could do that — she’d just need this training, this certification, boom. They presented it to her. She was excited. They wouldn’t have known, and she wasn’t going to ask because she didn’t even know the option existed. They would have lost a very, very good worker.

Angie 15:20 This brings up a hot button for me — advocating for yourself in your work environment. Do not leave your professional development up to chance or to somebody else. Women — this example leans right into us. We are really good at keeping ourselves small and being afraid to vocalize a desire.

Andre 15:35 Yep.

Angie 15:36 You made the decision for them before even giving them a chance. If you don’t ask, the answer is definitely no. And so I think this is a good moment to ask — because we’re talking about evolution as a person. For somebody out there listening who’s been pushed into leadership and isn’t a people person, or is a people person who isn’t being seen for leadership — how can we advocate for ourselves so we can evolve as both a person and a professional?

Andre 16:02 This is one of my favorite things. I just shared this in California yesterday — and Angie did not prime me to say this. We talk about leaders having one-on-ones with their people. Number one canceled and rescheduled meeting across all organizations. So I teach how to do it properly. But here’s the inverse one-on-one — for the individual looking up, not the leader looking down. If you are the employee and Angie is my boss, I want to say: hey Angie, I would love to have a one-on-one meeting with you. I know you’re busy, I’m busy. I’m available this day and time or this day and time. Here are some of the things I’d like to talk about. Are you free? Now I do not promise that your boss will schedule that one-on-one. But I do promise you’re going to find out who you work for. They’ll either say that’s a great idea, or they’ll blow you off. Either way — you now have information. In that one-on-one, first: start with gratitude. Hey, thanks so much for meeting with me, I’ve really enjoyed working here. Second: highlight your wins. If you lead a team, highlight the team’s wins — they know you’re the leader. If you don’t have a team, highlight the things you feel have been wins. Third: share your assessment. If I had this to do over again, here’s what I would do. Or: here’s an idea — what do you like about it? Always start with what they like, then ask if there’s anything they’d fine-tune. Now you have permission or protection. Maybe you have something you want to start — you can say: I’d love to give this a shot on my own for a month or two, is that okay? And lastly: gaps. Is there anything you need from me? Is there anything the organization needs? Your job is to protect your boss’s blind side. Beat them to problems they don’t see coming. You then become invaluable. But if you don’t tell them about the problems you beat them to — if they didn’t know the problems existed — they just know the job got done. They don’t know how it got done, and they may not even know to care.

Angie 18:00 You can’t assume they’re that aware.

Andre 18:02 You know how busy you are as an employee? Your boss is as busy, if not more. There are 17 Zoom calls, 200 emails a day. Do not assume their not knowing means they don’t care. Maybe they don’t have time-management skills, or people skills. Maybe they were thrust into leadership and are drowning just like you. Maybe they’re going through a divorce and their life is in shambles and they’re just trying to hold it together. Just because they make more money or have a higher title doesn’t mean they’re not a person. Give them grace and lead them to help lead you. And you’re going to find out who you work for. If everything works out — great, you stay as an asset. If it doesn’t — great, you leave as an asset. Don’t start doing worse thinking you’re going to leave on good terms and then go somewhere else and be better. You’ll just go somewhere and be bitter.

Angie 18:50 That baggage is going to go with you, and those habits are going to go with you. And this fundamentally comes down to that word I love: being human. It’s really about building communication skills and relationship skills — understanding and meeting people where they’re at, giving them what they need, whether that means being an asset to the boss or being the boss who meets an employee the way they want to be motivated. And I want to tie all of that back to the big picture of work-life harmony. Because if you’re growing your leadership skills and your communication skills and your human skills at work — guess where else it goes?

Andre 19:25 I just watched it happen. We were out to dinner a couple of months ago, my wife and I with another couple, and I toasted my wife for the amazing job she’s done in her new leadership role. She’s always been an inspired and motivated employee, an individual worker, always grinding and moving up through her own work — but she’d never led a team. Once she got that leadership role, I watched her develop. We both work from home quite a bit, and I heard her conversations. I really just had to honor her. I watched her development at work make her a better wife and mom at home. It wasn’t anything she was consciously trying to do — but it’s hard to be this way here and not bring it home. And for the first time in our situation, we were speaking the same language.

Angie 20:10 Isn’t that amazing — after however many years together, you reach yet another level of understanding and communication, and it all came through a professional angle that then influenced the personal. That’s such an interesting way to see how these life buckets converge. If you allow them to converge instead of compete, you reap the rewards on all sides.

Andre 20:30 Absolutely. I got to see her be so compassionate — I’d really never seen that side before. Seeing people for people and not their roles, knowing what each person needed. You become such a more empathic leader and better person when you’re leading correctly. And then you bring it home, and empathy just doesn’t turn off. I love that — because I’m a big nerd about leadership. To watch her start to be a nerd about it too was really, really cool.

Angie 20:55 I did a talk last summer on how to lead in an AI world, and it distilled down to: be a human. I’ve been a leadership nerd since I was 16 — I was the kid picked from my high school to go to some teen leadership development thing. It’s funny how those roots run deep. And through business growth and working with clients, you continue to flex and build that muscle. This is not something you reach a steady state with. The entire ecosystem continues to evolve. And if you can evolve as a leader, as a person, as a professional — even if you’re not leading people, you’re leading yourself and leading your life — everything becomes more harmonious. That is the perfect word for it.

Andre 21:35 Here’s a tip for work-life harmony — something I do every morning. I don’t believe in waking up and checking emails first thing or putting on the news. One of the first questions I ask myself is: what am I going to do to be great today? In the various roles I play — what am I going to do to be a great husband today? A great father? A great friend? I ask myself that question every single morning and I have never not had an answer. It starts my day off with purpose and a plan. And every now and then, take that question to the actual people in your life — your boss, an employee, your wife, your kids — and say: hey, I want to be great. I’ve been working on this, hopefully you’ve noticed. But if that’s not what you need from me right now, that’s not fair. So what is it that you need most from me right now?

Angie 22:20 You have to be willing to hear the feedback.

Andre 22:22 If you are leader enough to ask, you better be leader enough to listen. Because you’re not guaranteed to hear what you want to hear or how you want to hear it. And nine times out of ten, they’re going to BS you anyway — oh, everything’s fine, you’re great. Don’t believe that. If you’ve been in a conflict recently, that’s not the whole truth. So here’s the judo move: I appreciate you saying everything’s okay. I realize I caught you off guard. I’ve been thinking about this — maybe you haven’t. I want to ask you again later in the week, and if the answer is the same, fantastic. If it’s not, I really want to hear it. Sometimes you have to give people permission and time to answer you honestly. Most people don’t like confrontation. They might not be quick on their feet. They may not think you can handle their truth. So give them a window — tell them when you’re available and that you really want to hear it. Whatever they say, you don’t have to act on all of it. But if you act on even a little bit, it’s amazing what can happen.

Angie 23:10 And you’re creating an environment where future feedback becomes easier — because you’ve given blanket permission to provide it. That comes back to the whole corporate performance review framework that delivers feedback 364 days after the fact. Hello — what good is telling me I screwed up right after my performance review last year? I love this concept of being leader enough to listen, in all aspects of your life — at home, at work, in your friend circle — and creating an environment where people have permission to be heard.

Andre 23:45 That’s huge. And for work-life harmony — you’ve got to get rid of the bobble heads in your life. We all know them. The person you could call right now and complain about your job, your spouse, your kids, your car — doesn’t matter — and they’ll just say: oh you’re so right, I don’t know how you deal with it. Only to send you back more righteously wrong about whatever you were complaining about.

Angie 24:05 So righteously wrong. Get out of the echo chamber, y’all.

Andre 24:08 Chest out, all puffed up, wrong as heck — or at the very minimum, completely one-sided. My friends all have permission to challenge me, and they’ve graciously given me permission to challenge them. The older we get, we actually say it out loud. When we were young we didn’t even have the language for it — we’d celebrate each other’s mishaps because they were entertaining. Now: give your friends permission to see all the sides. Your boss’s side, the company’s side, your wife’s side, your kids’ side. The chance of you being 100% right about everything is not likely. And the chance of the other person being 100% wrong about everything is not likely either. So what are they right about?

Angie 24:50 I think we just came full circle back to that word we used at the beginning — vulnerability. And this is a shameless plug for both of us: if you have no one in your life, or if you’re only surrounded by bobble heads, this is where people like Andre and I help. Unbiased, lovingly, kindly direct — people who will hold your feet to the flame if that’s what you need to evolve. On that note — how do people find you and follow all this fantastic wisdom?

Andre 25:15 The easiest way to get in touch is at my website: youevolvingnow.com. There are videos, all of my books and workbooks. I’m proud to say my fifth book is coming out October 21, 2025 — The Complete Leader. Along with it we’ll be releasing an AI tool called Ask Andre. Whether you’re a volunteer leader, a middle manager, a first-time leader, or in the C-suite — imagine having an AI tool with all of my content from my books, online programs, and more, plus frequently asked questions to reduce your thinking. You’ve got a meeting in five minutes and you need to have a tough conversation. What would Andre do? You input the type of employee and the type of leader you are, and within 20 seconds you have a solution to your problem — or something as simple as: give me a leadership tip for today. What’s one small thing I can do for my team? Within 20 seconds, boom.

Angie 26:10 So essentially — come October, nobody out there has any reason to stay in their echo chamber full of bobble heads, because you’re going to have Andre in your pocket. I love it. Andre Young, everybody — thank you so much for being here. This was such a fun conversation with so many great tidbits, regardless of where you are in your life or leadership journey. I appreciate the inspiration that comes from being vulnerable, and giving us ways to think about how we can be leaders no matter where we are in that journey. I am so grateful to have had you today. Thank you.

Andre 26:45 Thank you for having me. You guys listening — have an awesome day.

Angie 26:50 And everybody out there — thank you for spending time with us this Monday morning. I’m going to challenge you to think about the areas of your life and leadership where you may be ready to evolve. Is it a new habit? A mindset shift? Better work-life harmony? What are you going to do to be great today? I’ll see you next week for another edition of No More Mondays.